unknown
2005-07-29 01:56:50 UTC
This is a synopsis meant to be sent to prospective agents for my first
novel. Would anyone be willing to give comments on it as a document for
selling my work?
(Literary comments would also be welcome, but the novel itself has
just been through Critters for a second time, after a rewrite, and
although I'm still waiting for crits to dribble in, I don't anticipate
any drastic changes to the plot at this stage.)
Thanks in advance!
Ben
======================================================================
synopsis of Have Dominion
science fiction, 80,000 words
Benjamin Crowell
(address)
(phone number)
Background
The year is 2191. In its expansion into the solar system, Homo
sapiens has created an underclass of artificial intelligences and
genetically modified humans. But unknown to the human tribe, an
older, more advanced race has been working behind the scenes; they
have built a vast, hidden habitat under the surface of the asteroid
Ceres, where samples of Earth life have continued to evolve in a
low-gravity environment.
Characters
April, the protagonist, is a hominid from Ceres with a coat of yellow
fur. Asteroid miner Luiz Diegues has stumbled upon the Cerean
habitat, stolen the infant April, and sold her to genetically
modified humans in an Earth-orbit colony, who plan to use her as a
host mother to circumvent Earth's reproductive controls. April has
been raised by Nanny, an artificial intelligence housed in the body
of a panda.
Audience, Tone, and Theme
The story is aimed at the female YA market, but should also interest
adults. Until April escapes from her owners, old public-domain books
are her sole source of information about the human race, and this
leads to humorous and satirical episodes. Her quest to find out where
she came from is also her quest to learn what it is to be a human
being, and how to love and be loved.
Synopsis
April learns of her owners' plan to use her as a host mother, and
looks for a way to escape their orbiting farm habitat. Luiz sneaks
aboard the habitat, locates April via her DNA trail, and steals her
and Nanny. He hasn't seen April since she was a baby, and, like her
owners, believes that she isn't intelligent. Aboard his spaceship, he
intends to put April into a state of hibernation, but she puts him in
the hibernation chamber instead, and takes over the ship.
The ship is designed for fully automated cruising while its crew is
in hibernation, but April and Nanny don't know its destination. They
discover a frozen, evacuated cargo hold full of exotic animals, which
they infer come from the same place April did. The ship
malfunctions, Nanny takes a heavy dose of radiation, and they're
forced to wake Luiz. Luiz is embarrassed at mistaking April for an
animal and selling her, and is also impressed by Nanny's heroic
self-sacrifice. They reactivate the ship's artificial intelligence,
and in order to gain time to repair Nanny's panda body, the two AIs
are forced to temporarily cohabit the same computer, an experience
that pushes them over the threshold into true sentience. Luiz
describes discovering the Cerean habitat fifteen years ago, after its
buried surface was uncovered by a meteor impact. Due to treachery
surrounding his sale of April, Luiz had been left in hibernation ever
since. April gets a crush on Luiz.
They arrive at an asteroid colony, where they meet April's older
sister Monica, whom Luiz had left with his girlfriend. Monica has
grown up angry, with subhuman social status. April, Luiz, Monica, and
Nanny set off for Ceres. Monica sexually manipulates Luiz, and April
has to spend the voyage in hibernation. When she wakes up, she learns
that Luiz is an alcoholic, who only dries out periodically by going
into hibernation.
Inside the underground habitat, April and Nanny discover a DNA trail
left by beings of April's species, and the trail leads them to a
hidden doorway to a second habitat. Before they have time to
investigate it thoroughly, they get into a dispute with Monica.
Monica wipes Nanny's memory, and April, enraged, brandishes a cooking
knife at Monica and threatens to kill her. Nanny is now programmed to
be loyal to Monica, and goes after April, rifle in hand. April
escapes into the second habitat, but Nanny slips in after her before
the door automatically closes. April at first has no sympathy for the
new Nanny, who is trying to catch or kill her, but gradually starts
to feel sorry for her. The two strike up an ironic friendship by
radio. April evades Nanny by taking to the trees, which she can
easily climb in the low gravity.
Nanny, attempting to follow April's DNA trail, instead comes across
Sonu, a stone-age shepherd boy of April's species. Nanny and Sonu
begin learning each other's languages, and Sonu, unknown to Nanny,
makes contact with April and falls in love with her. Sonu and his
grandparents disarm Nanny and take her parole. We learn that the
adults of April's species are three meters tall. The tribe perceives
the situation as a deadly feud between the witches April and Monica,
and conducts a trial involving the barbaric custom of democracy. As a
result of the trial, April comes to see her own actions in a
different light, and forgives Monica.
The tribe requires April to make peace with Monica, so, accompanied
by Nanny and Sonu, she heads back through a third habitat, which has
been sealed off for fifty million years. The life in this habitat has
undergone radical evolutionary change since being brought up from
Earth. They encounter an injured member of an intelligent species,
rescue him from a predatory bird, and return to the original area
through which they had entered. Months have passed. Monica is
pregnant by Luiz, demonstrating that April's people are not really a
separate species from Homo sapiens. A chain of events set in motion
by the meteor impact has led to the accelerating deterioration of the
habitat's life-support systems. They evacuate the tribe's children to
orbit, and the rest of the tribe's prospects for survival are
uncertain. Monica manumits Nanny, and behaves heroically, confirming
April's decision to forgive her.
novel. Would anyone be willing to give comments on it as a document for
selling my work?
(Literary comments would also be welcome, but the novel itself has
just been through Critters for a second time, after a rewrite, and
although I'm still waiting for crits to dribble in, I don't anticipate
any drastic changes to the plot at this stage.)
Thanks in advance!
Ben
======================================================================
synopsis of Have Dominion
science fiction, 80,000 words
Benjamin Crowell
(address)
(phone number)
Background
The year is 2191. In its expansion into the solar system, Homo
sapiens has created an underclass of artificial intelligences and
genetically modified humans. But unknown to the human tribe, an
older, more advanced race has been working behind the scenes; they
have built a vast, hidden habitat under the surface of the asteroid
Ceres, where samples of Earth life have continued to evolve in a
low-gravity environment.
Characters
April, the protagonist, is a hominid from Ceres with a coat of yellow
fur. Asteroid miner Luiz Diegues has stumbled upon the Cerean
habitat, stolen the infant April, and sold her to genetically
modified humans in an Earth-orbit colony, who plan to use her as a
host mother to circumvent Earth's reproductive controls. April has
been raised by Nanny, an artificial intelligence housed in the body
of a panda.
Audience, Tone, and Theme
The story is aimed at the female YA market, but should also interest
adults. Until April escapes from her owners, old public-domain books
are her sole source of information about the human race, and this
leads to humorous and satirical episodes. Her quest to find out where
she came from is also her quest to learn what it is to be a human
being, and how to love and be loved.
Synopsis
April learns of her owners' plan to use her as a host mother, and
looks for a way to escape their orbiting farm habitat. Luiz sneaks
aboard the habitat, locates April via her DNA trail, and steals her
and Nanny. He hasn't seen April since she was a baby, and, like her
owners, believes that she isn't intelligent. Aboard his spaceship, he
intends to put April into a state of hibernation, but she puts him in
the hibernation chamber instead, and takes over the ship.
The ship is designed for fully automated cruising while its crew is
in hibernation, but April and Nanny don't know its destination. They
discover a frozen, evacuated cargo hold full of exotic animals, which
they infer come from the same place April did. The ship
malfunctions, Nanny takes a heavy dose of radiation, and they're
forced to wake Luiz. Luiz is embarrassed at mistaking April for an
animal and selling her, and is also impressed by Nanny's heroic
self-sacrifice. They reactivate the ship's artificial intelligence,
and in order to gain time to repair Nanny's panda body, the two AIs
are forced to temporarily cohabit the same computer, an experience
that pushes them over the threshold into true sentience. Luiz
describes discovering the Cerean habitat fifteen years ago, after its
buried surface was uncovered by a meteor impact. Due to treachery
surrounding his sale of April, Luiz had been left in hibernation ever
since. April gets a crush on Luiz.
They arrive at an asteroid colony, where they meet April's older
sister Monica, whom Luiz had left with his girlfriend. Monica has
grown up angry, with subhuman social status. April, Luiz, Monica, and
Nanny set off for Ceres. Monica sexually manipulates Luiz, and April
has to spend the voyage in hibernation. When she wakes up, she learns
that Luiz is an alcoholic, who only dries out periodically by going
into hibernation.
Inside the underground habitat, April and Nanny discover a DNA trail
left by beings of April's species, and the trail leads them to a
hidden doorway to a second habitat. Before they have time to
investigate it thoroughly, they get into a dispute with Monica.
Monica wipes Nanny's memory, and April, enraged, brandishes a cooking
knife at Monica and threatens to kill her. Nanny is now programmed to
be loyal to Monica, and goes after April, rifle in hand. April
escapes into the second habitat, but Nanny slips in after her before
the door automatically closes. April at first has no sympathy for the
new Nanny, who is trying to catch or kill her, but gradually starts
to feel sorry for her. The two strike up an ironic friendship by
radio. April evades Nanny by taking to the trees, which she can
easily climb in the low gravity.
Nanny, attempting to follow April's DNA trail, instead comes across
Sonu, a stone-age shepherd boy of April's species. Nanny and Sonu
begin learning each other's languages, and Sonu, unknown to Nanny,
makes contact with April and falls in love with her. Sonu and his
grandparents disarm Nanny and take her parole. We learn that the
adults of April's species are three meters tall. The tribe perceives
the situation as a deadly feud between the witches April and Monica,
and conducts a trial involving the barbaric custom of democracy. As a
result of the trial, April comes to see her own actions in a
different light, and forgives Monica.
The tribe requires April to make peace with Monica, so, accompanied
by Nanny and Sonu, she heads back through a third habitat, which has
been sealed off for fifty million years. The life in this habitat has
undergone radical evolutionary change since being brought up from
Earth. They encounter an injured member of an intelligent species,
rescue him from a predatory bird, and return to the original area
through which they had entered. Months have passed. Monica is
pregnant by Luiz, demonstrating that April's people are not really a
separate species from Homo sapiens. A chain of events set in motion
by the meteor impact has led to the accelerating deterioration of the
habitat's life-support systems. They evacuate the tribe's children to
orbit, and the rest of the tribe's prospects for survival are
uncertain. Monica manumits Nanny, and behaves heroically, confirming
April's decision to forgive her.