GT
2005-04-06 14:35:50 UTC
http://www.unconfirmedsources.com/?itemid=583
Is Tom DeLay Guilty? Who Cares!
The Republican controlled House of Representatives have voted on a
Rules Change that would allow Texan Tom DeLay to continue on as
Speaker of the House in spite of the fact that Mr. DeLay may be
charged by the House Ethics Committee for various violations.
The new rules would allow Mr. DeLay to continue in the Speakers post
even if he is charged, tried, convicted and sentenced to death for
crimes consisting of but not limited to illegal fund raising, illegal
use of the FAA to track down Democratic rivals, illegal redistricting
of Texas Congressional Seats to benefit Republican candidates, sodomy,
murder, cross dressing, genocide and finally, the illegal use of a
nuclear weapon.
Unnamed White House Source Wegman (Pudgy) Waterhouse, speaking on the
condition of anonymity said, "Sure Tommy has some faults; who among us
doesn't? Except the President of course, don't even start that
crap...he's Gods Anointed even if he does have the occasional Man Date
so I don't want to hear it.
"Anyway, back to Tommy. The point is that Democrats are vicious,
lying, cheating scum who have no compulsion about using something as
trivial as Tom DeLay being indicted for, say, rape and murder against
him for their own political gains. It's not like he supported Abortion
or Gay Marriage or anything, so we're square with the Christian
Fundamentalists. Fundamentalists don't seem to care about breaking
laws as long as we don't use dirty words. Naturally, that doesn't mean
that Dick Cheney has a problem since Christian Fundamentalists also
seem to overlook dirty words too as long as they come from their
candidates.
Mr. DeLay and company have had a bit of a rough year, legally
speaking. Three of Mr. DeLay's top aides have already been indicted in
Texas for breaking laws regarding his fund raising activities. Mr.
DeLay has also been accused of illegally soliciting campaign
contributions, laundering campaign contributions to influence state
legislative races and the improper use of his office to influence
various federal agencies. Rebuked by a House Ethics Committee at the
end of September for pressuring a fellow member of the House to switch
his vote on a health care bill, Mr. DeLay has also been subpoenaed to
give information regarding his use of the Federal Aviation
Administration to track down a plane owned by a rival Texas Democrat
who fled the state rather than allow Mr. DeLay to illegally change
voting district boundaries to aid his fellow Republicans.
Waterhouse, speaking on the condition of even more anonymity said, "I
know that changing the rules to allow Tom to serve even if he's
charged with mass murder just two weeks after the election may look
strange, but think about it: if we waited till Tom was actually in
prison the vote might then have been more difficult. As it is we're
terribly busy installing audio/video hookups to Tom's future prison
cell so he can continue to participate in the Democratic Process even
after sentencing, so it's good to get this done now."
Is Tom DeLay Guilty? Who Cares!
The Republican controlled House of Representatives have voted on a
Rules Change that would allow Texan Tom DeLay to continue on as
Speaker of the House in spite of the fact that Mr. DeLay may be
charged by the House Ethics Committee for various violations.
The new rules would allow Mr. DeLay to continue in the Speakers post
even if he is charged, tried, convicted and sentenced to death for
crimes consisting of but not limited to illegal fund raising, illegal
use of the FAA to track down Democratic rivals, illegal redistricting
of Texas Congressional Seats to benefit Republican candidates, sodomy,
murder, cross dressing, genocide and finally, the illegal use of a
nuclear weapon.
Unnamed White House Source Wegman (Pudgy) Waterhouse, speaking on the
condition of anonymity said, "Sure Tommy has some faults; who among us
doesn't? Except the President of course, don't even start that
crap...he's Gods Anointed even if he does have the occasional Man Date
so I don't want to hear it.
"Anyway, back to Tommy. The point is that Democrats are vicious,
lying, cheating scum who have no compulsion about using something as
trivial as Tom DeLay being indicted for, say, rape and murder against
him for their own political gains. It's not like he supported Abortion
or Gay Marriage or anything, so we're square with the Christian
Fundamentalists. Fundamentalists don't seem to care about breaking
laws as long as we don't use dirty words. Naturally, that doesn't mean
that Dick Cheney has a problem since Christian Fundamentalists also
seem to overlook dirty words too as long as they come from their
candidates.
Mr. DeLay and company have had a bit of a rough year, legally
speaking. Three of Mr. DeLay's top aides have already been indicted in
Texas for breaking laws regarding his fund raising activities. Mr.
DeLay has also been accused of illegally soliciting campaign
contributions, laundering campaign contributions to influence state
legislative races and the improper use of his office to influence
various federal agencies. Rebuked by a House Ethics Committee at the
end of September for pressuring a fellow member of the House to switch
his vote on a health care bill, Mr. DeLay has also been subpoenaed to
give information regarding his use of the Federal Aviation
Administration to track down a plane owned by a rival Texas Democrat
who fled the state rather than allow Mr. DeLay to illegally change
voting district boundaries to aid his fellow Republicans.
Waterhouse, speaking on the condition of even more anonymity said, "I
know that changing the rules to allow Tom to serve even if he's
charged with mass murder just two weeks after the election may look
strange, but think about it: if we waited till Tom was actually in
prison the vote might then have been more difficult. As it is we're
terribly busy installing audio/video hookups to Tom's future prison
cell so he can continue to participate in the Democratic Process even
after sentencing, so it's good to get this done now."