The reports of my death...

[Will Dockery]

“The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.” -Mark Twain

[Hieronymous Corey]

Whoosh.

[Will Dockery]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Whoosh.

That's those good vibes whooshing by?

[Will Dockery]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Whoosh.

Is that part of your "Jesus Farted" poem, Pastor Corey?

:)

[Hieronymous Corey]

"Jesus Farted" poem? Whoosh.

[Will Dockery]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
"Jesus Farted" poem? Whoosh.

Lighten up, Pastor Corey... can't you take a joke?

[Hieronymous Corey]

Huh? What joke? What are you talking about?

[Will Dockery]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Huh? What joke? What are you talking about?

Whoosh.

:)

[Hieronymous Corey]

If you can't explain yourself, you can't explain yourself. I'm tired of asking.

[Hieronymous Corey]

I honestly don't see the joke, or the humor in
you pretending to be more stupid than you are.

[Perry Winkle]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
If you can't explain yourself, you can't explain yourself. I'm tired of asking.

Sure he can, Pastor C.

[Will Dockery]

Hieronymous Corey, do you deny you've posted quite a few fart and Jesus poems?

[Hieronymous Corey]

Why ask like that? Why ask if I'm 'denying' something?
Why not simply explain what you mean by quoting
"Jesus Farted" like it was the title of a poem I wrote?

[André Hugo]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Whoosh.

Did you fart again, Pastor Corey....?

[Bodeen]

Shut up, Pendragon....

[The Real General Zod]

Post by Will Dockery
“The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.” -Mark Twain

Ha ha ha....

[Will Dockery]

Post by The Real General Zod

Post by Will Dockery
“The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.” -Mark Twain

Ha ha ha....

So much for the morbid fantasy of sleazy trolls.

;)

[Will Dockery]

To say the least...

;)

[Will Dockery]

So the joke went over your head.

Don't worry about it.

;)

[Hieronymous Corey]

What, me worry?

[Will Dockery]

WTF?

:)

[Hieronymous Corey]

'What, me worry?' is a reference to Alfred E. Neuman.

[Rex Hunter Jr.]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
'What, me worry?' is a reference to Alfred E. Neuman.

I think any American would know that.....

WTF? was a reference to you and your habit of avoiding questions............

[Hieronymous Corey]

For example?

[Rex Hunter Jr.]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
For example?

See the other thread... the 1969 thread......

[Hieronymous Corey]

I can't imagine what questions you might hve of me that I haven't already answered.

[Rex Hunter Jr.]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
I can't imagine what questions you might hve of me that I haven't already answered.

George Dance asked the questions.....

[Hieronymous Corey]

Huh? George Dance asked who questions when? Where?

[Rex Hunter Jr.]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Huh? George Dance asked who questions when? Where?

Smoki8ng that good weed again I see Pastor Corey....??

[Hieronymous Corey]

Is that supposed to be a joke too?

[Will Dockery]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Is that supposed to be a joke too?

Which one?

[Hieronymous Corey]

'What, me worry?' is a reference to Alfred E. Neuman.

[Will Dockery]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
'What, me worry?' is a reference to Alfred E. Neuman.

Yes, I'm very familiar with Mad Magazine, as you might have guessed.

[Hieronymous Corey]

LOL. Okay. Never mind.

[Will Dockery]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
LOL. Okay. Never mind.

That's fine with me.

:)

[Hieronymous Corey]

Okay, so that's fine with you. Great.
The question is what's funny with you?
What's funny about "Jesus Farted"?
I'm not worried about your joke going
over my head. I'm just trying to find some
common ground besides MAD magazine.

[Will Dockery]

You were a fan of Mad Magazine?

National Lampoon as well?

[Hieronymous Corey]

Okay, so what's funny about "Jesus Farted"?

[Will Dockery]

Where did I claim it was funny?

[Hieronymous Corey]

You said it was a joke that went over my head. I
assume jokes are meant to be funny or humorous
in some way to somebody. I obviously don't get
the joke, so I figured it had to be funny to you.

[Will Dockery]

No, I think I've stated before that don't enjoy your joke verses as much as I do your more serious poems.

Poems about Jesus and farting are not really that funny or interesting to me.

[Hieronymous Corey]

What are you talking about? You're the one who invented "Jesus Farted".
That is entirely your creation. I wrote a poem based on a bible verse, for
use in bible study, with Christians of like mind who like to study the bible.
Most of my poems are meant to incite provocative new ways of thinking
about old ideas. Okay, so they're not for you. No worries, but when you
repeat things like "Jesus Farted", it appears you aren't familiar with text.

[George J. Dance]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Okay, so what's funny about "Jesus Farted"?

FWIW, it always makes me think of Matthew 19:14.

[Hieronymous Corey]

Why is that, George?

[George J. Dance]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Why is that, George?

Because that *could* be why the children suffer to come unto him.

[Hieronymous Corey]

Whoosh. Sorry. You lost me.
Is that a joke? If so, how does
it relate to Will's comment?
I could use a laugh. Care to explan?

[Michael Pendragon]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Whoosh. Sorry. You lost me.
Is that a joke? If so, how does
it relate to Will's comment?
I could use a laugh. Care to explan?

It's a really, really, R E A L L Y bad attempt at a joke -- even worse than the original fart joke.

Dunce is saying that since Jesus is afflicted with chronic flatulence, the children who come within smelling distance of him suffer from the stench.

[Hieronymous Corey]

Is it metaphorical with respect to Jesus being afflicted with the chronic?
Do you know the chronic is, and what it means to be afflicted with it?

[Michael Pendragon]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Is it metaphorical with respect to Jesus being afflicted with the chronic?
Do you know the chronic is, and what it means to be afflicted with it?

Not firsthand, but I'm, as they say in the vernacular, it stinks.

[Hieronymous Corey]

Are you saying you don't smoke pot,
but are familiar with the smell, or are
you making a qualitative judgement?

[Michael Pendragon]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Are you saying you don't smoke pot,
but are familiar with the smell, or are
you making a qualitative judgement?

I thought we were discussing Jesus' chronic flatulence.

I don't smoke pot, am familiar with the smell, and qualitative judge it to resemble the odor of a skunk.

[Hieronymous Corey]

All things being equal with respect to metaphors
and whatnot, I'd much rather discuss the smell of
pot than another man's farts, if you don't mind.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.

[Michael Pendragon]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
All things being equal with respect to metaphors
and whatnot, I'd much rather discuss the smell of
pot than another man's farts, if you don't mind.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.

I appreciate your honesty in having specified "another man's."

[Hieronymous Corey]

Sure, no worries. I'm all about the humanity of Jesus anyway.

[Michael Pendragon]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Sure, no worries. I'm all about the humanity of Jesus anyway.

Does farting constitute humanity in your opinion?

I think it obvious that even God must be subject to frequent bouts of flatulence. How else does one account for Will, Stinky George, Dunce, Pick, Bill Clinton, et al?

[Hieronymous Corey]

Did you know that people fart an average of fourteen
times a day amounting to about a half liter of gas?

[Michael Pendragon]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Did you know that people fart an average of fourteen
times a day amounting to about a half liter of gas?

Know, I didn't.

I did, however, suspect that you would prove a veritable fount of information on the subject.

[Hieronymous Corey]

As people age, senses deteriorate. Eyesight fails,
and although you may lose your sense of smell
entirely, you'll never lose the ability to raise a stink.
Farting is a very common human act. When all
else fails, people can still makes sense of smell.

[Michael Pendragon]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
As people age, senses deteriorate. Eyesight fails,
and although you may lose your sense of smell
entirely, you'll never lose the ability to raise a stink.
Farting is a very common human act. When all
else fails, people can still makes sense of smell.

Ugh! Your attempt at humor is even more pathetic (not to mention, illogical) than Dunce's.

If one loses his sense of smell, he will not be able to still make sense/scents of it.

[Hieronymous Corey]

I know several seniors who've lost the ability to smell themselves.
That doesn't mean they don't smell. It just means they don't smell
me, and aren't particularly bothered by the fact that I am bothered
by the fact that they smell, because they're just old fucks who don't
give a fuck how I smell so long as I do what the fuck I'm there to do.

[Michael Pendragon]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
I know several seniors who've lost the ability to smell themselves.
That doesn't mean they don't smell. It just means they don't smell
me, and aren't particularly bothered by the fact that I am bothered
by the fact that they smell, because they're just old fucks who don't
give a fuck how I smell so long as I do what the fuck I'm there to do.

Age has its advantages after all.

[Hieronymous Corey]

Which is more important, a bigger hard drive or a faster processor?

[Will Dockery]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Which is more important, a bigger hard drive or a faster processor?

It depends on the tasks, right?

[Will Dockery]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Sure, no worries. I'm all about the humanity of Jesus anyway.

"Beans, beans, good for the heart..."

"Beans, beans, spinach, beef stew, tomatoes, beans."

[Will Dockery]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Are you saying you don't smoke pot,
but are familiar with the smell, or are
you making a qualitative judgement?

I'm pretty sure most folks know the smell of burning reefer.

[Hieronymous Corey]

I take it you didn't understand the question?

[Will Dockery]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
I take it you didn't understand the question?

Who are you asking?

[Hieronymous Corey]

You, obviously.

[Ray Novack]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
You, obviously.

You make no sense my preacher friend......

[George Sulzbach]

Post by George J. Dance

Post by Hieronymous Corey
Why is that, George?

Because that *could* be why the children suffer to come unto him.

I like to go to the playground and fart on kids' heads, especially with a fresh load in my drawers. The little fuckers don't know what to do.

[Rex Hunter Jr.]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
'What, me worry?' is a reference to Alfred E. Neuman.

Is that supposed to be some kind of news flash, Pastor Corey....?

[Hieronymous Corey]

News flash?

[High Number]

Post by Hieronymous Corey
News flash?

Apparently.....

[Michael Pendragon]

Post by Rex Hunter Jr.

Post by Hieronymous Corey
I can't imagine what questions you might hve of me that I haven't already answered.

George Dance asked the questions.....

Shut up, Todd.

[Will Dockery]

It was a simple yes or no question.

;)

[Rex Hunter Jr.]

Post by Will Dockery
“The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.” -Mark Twain

Exactly, my friend, exactly....

[Will Dockery]

"It's alive!" -Victor Frankenstein

[Rex Hunter Jr.]

Post by Will Dockery
"It's alive!" -Victor Frankenstein

[Will Dockery]

Post by Rex Hunter Jr.

Post by Will Dockery
"It's alive!" -Victor Frankenstein

http://youtu.be/QuoKNZjr8_U

One of the greatest films ever, in any genre....

[Rex Hunter Jr.]

Post by Will Dockery

Post by Rex Hunter Jr.

Post by Will Dockery
"It's alive!" -Victor Frankenstein

http://youtu.be/QuoKNZjr8_U

One of the greatest films ever, in any genre....

The Universal horro noir was hardtop top...

Tis true....

[Rex Hunter Jr.]

Who, Pastor Corey?

[Rex Hunter Jr.]

Pastor Corey.... farted?

[Will Dockery]

Universal Studios monsters are the best, I agree

:)

[Ray Osburn]

Post by Will Dockery
Universal Studios monsters are the best, I agree
:)

Yes.......

[Will Dockery]

“The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.” -Mark Twain

To say the least.

;)

[Michael Pendragon]

Post by Will Dockery
“The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.” -Mark Twain
To say the least.

The first time one posts a famous quote, it has the effect of making him appear to be somewhat well-read; his presumed level of literacy being in obverse proportion to the degree of said quotation's fame.

The tenth time one posts the same famous quote, it fosters the presumption that said quote forms the totality of his literary education.

[Will Dockery]

Post by Michael Pendragon

Post by Will Dockery
“The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.” -Mark Twain

The tenth time one posts the same famous quote

I only posted it once, at the start of the thread, Pendragon.

Try to understand how a thread works, in your old age.

:)

[Michael Pendragon]

Post by Will Dockery

Post by Michael Pendragon

Post by Will Dockery
“The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.” -Mark Twain

The tenth time one posts the same famous quote

I only posted it once, at the start of the thread, Pendragon.
Try to understand how a thread works, in your old age.

Why do you lie so much, Will?

Post by Will Dockery

Post by Michael Pendragon

Post by Will Dockery
http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/04212/354120.stm
Pizza man killed making delivery on North Side
Last order costs his life
Friday, July 30, 2004

- snip -
1 pizza boy down thousands to go

"Reports of my death are greatly exaggerated."
-Mark Twain
Reports that you're learning to drive at age 28 are not exaggerated, though.
"Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the
process
he does not become a monster. And when you look into
the abyss,
the abyss also looks into you"
- Nietzsche, From Beyond Good and Evil, (1886)
=====
http://www.lulu.com/dockery

[Will Dockery]

Post by Will Dockery
“The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.” -Mark Twain

You've been using that quote regularly since as far back as 2004

Not that often in 15 years, Pendragon... only when it is appropriate.

;)

[High Number]

Post by Will Dockery
“The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.” -Mark Twain
To say the least.
;)

It is a good line when appropriate.....

[Will Dockery]

Exactly...